posted by Milla — she=he, written by Hilde
Click here to see what happened previously.
Milla, I am going to keep this short because I have plenty of other
needs that I want to meet today but I don’t want to keep you waiting
either. In fact I feel rather surprised that you are hearing the needs I
mentioned as being unmet, on the contrary, Milla so far my needs for
intellectual challenge, some novelty, learning, meeting a variety of
people and for space, for connections without the emphasis on
closeness, are being met in this exchange. I did say that I felt
comfortable with the exchange and I was hoping that would be clear
I just feel doubtful about skype calls, I don’t think I’ll be
able to keep the distance (space/privacy) I need to ensure my internal
harmony. Therefore I am not accepting your offer to go that route yet.
I felt hesitant to get in touch with you because I was afraid that you
would ask about skype again, but that issue is no longer a problem for
me since I have been able to connect it to my need for privacy. I also
fear being probed and asked to explain and clarify every word or
sentence I write. Your last reply did trigger this fear again but I
think I am also clearer about that now. I have a need for ease, for
spontaneity. I don’t want to push myself constantly to connect every
word I say or every move I make to a need. If you need this kind of
dedication for your own comfort and if you want to make communication
with me dependant on an agreement to hunt for needs non stop, I may find
myself withdrawing. I need to choose my own level of comfort regarding
How would it be for you if I chose to reply only when I do feel I have
the energy to go need hunting, even if that would mean that it might
take several weeks or up to month for me to get back to you?
That way I am convinced that my needs for fun or effectiveness will be
Till mid-August, I may not be able to reply quickly
because I want to focus on my family.
Filed under: > Milla & The Ban |